Yom Kippur D'var Torah 5783

Vanderbilt Hillel, 2022


G’mar Chatimah Tovah, y’all. 


Sigh. Yom Kippur. Day of Atonement. Day of “I’m Sorry”. Holiest day of the Jewish year. Jewish Guilt day. 


These are all phrases we use to describe this day. But none of them fully encapsulate the experience of observing Yom Kippur.


There are a lot of memories and feelings that I associate with Yom Kippur-- the slightly cooler air, everyone dressed all in white, going to synagogue ALL DAY, and hangry relatives - just to name a few. But the most striking part of Yom Kippur for me is the Viddui. The Viddui is a prayer we say only on Yom Kippur, it means Confession. This is what you probably think of when you think of Yom Kippur- Jews in Talitot piously beating their chests with their fists. Doo-doo-doo, doo-doo-doo…


The prayer that we say in ashkenazi communities is also called the “ashamnu,” literally “we have sinned.” It continues with 

Wow!! That’s a lot. 


I don’t know about you, but I don’t think I’ve done all of those things! Maybe some, I might have mocked someone, but I certainly haven’t stolen or turned away from Torah, nor been physically violent. 


So why should I beat my chest and apologise?? I didn’t do these things, they aren’t my sins. 


One common answer is that someone in our community did commit that sin, and saying the confession with them helps them to repent.


That’s very nice, but I think the answer for me comes from a tradition from a very different Jewish Holiday-- Passover. On Pesach, we tell the story of the Israelites exodus from captivity in Egypt. When we think about telling this story, we are told to imagine four children to whom we are explaining:


Clearly no child is only one of these things - no child is entirely wise nor entirely simple. But these serve as a helpful paradigm to help us answer questions that children might ask us. 


For this d’var, I want to focus on the Wicked Child. The Hagaddah says that this child asks:


"What does this mean to you?" (Exodus 12:26). - To you and not to this child. Since this child withdraws from the community and denies G!d's role in the Exodus, challenge the child by replying, "This is done because of what the Eternal One did for me when I went out of Egypt." (Exodus 13:8). - For me and not for you. Had you been there you would not have been redeemed.


What a harsh judgement for a child! I would never say that to a kid.


The Hagaddah I grew up using, A Night Of Questions, asked us to interrogate the impulse to call that child wicked. It suggested “hostile” or “alienated.” And I think that that perspective shift is actually integral to how we approach community building.


Because really, why would a child act wicked or hostile during a family seder? Perhaps they are tired, or again, hangry. Or, perhaps they don’t feel that they are a part of the community. They ask about YOU, not including themselves. That understanding of themself as alienated from the community did not come from the child themself, but rather from the messaging that the child has received from said community. In a community that welcomes the child, the child will feel, well, welcomed! It’s not fair to place all the blame on the child, and label them as “wicked.”


And I think that’s true of the Viddui too. While I personally haven’t stolen, turned away from Torah, or been physically violent, there are people in my community who undoubtably have. And, while it would be kind to help them repent, I don’t actually think that’s why we say the entire Viddui in first-person plural. It’s not “for those who have sinned,” it’s “we have sinned.” Even if I did not actively steal, I live in a community in which theft happens. 


It would be easy for me to say- “well, those folks are just wicked and they’re doing the wrong thing,” but we know that’s not the full story. No child is completely wicked.


Instead, I might say-- “there are people in my community who have needs that they are unable to fill without stealing, what have I done to contribute to the issue” OR even “what have I NOT done to alleviate the problem.”

As Jews, we always pray in community- to say many of our important prayers, we need a minyan- a group of 10 adult Jews. This is certainly important to my understanding of Judaism as grounded in community. And the viddui underscores that. We are all interconnected.


Last night, Ari talked about the Unetanetokef prayer, which ends by telling us how to repent - through teshuvah - internal reflection, tefilah - prayer, and tzedakah - justice work.


Teshuvah is individual - it’s important to do that soul-searching. 


Tefillah is communal in that we pray together, but on another level it’s really about one’s relationship with G!d.


Tzedakah though, justice work, is undoubtably relational. You cannot make the world more whole without communicating with people- about what they need, about what they have done, and about lessons they’ve already learned.


This year, I’d like to invite you to remember that communal, interconnected nature of our community and humanity. Before condemning someone- “cancelling” them, or calling them “wicked”- try to understand them, and to see it from their perspective. Reach out to others, and find out what needs they have that aren’t being met. 


By connecting authentically and non-judgmentally, perhaps we can repair what’s broken just a bit more and maybe, just maybe, have a little less to repent for next Yom Kippur.


Or maybe not! But either way, we will have tried our best.


G’mar Chatimah Tovah.